toddlers, emails and thank yous (+ tips for making thank you email videos with your kids!)

Thank you to Yahoo! Mail for sponsoring this post about staying connected. I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do.

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The Bug got her first email yesterday.

It was from Southwest Airlines. Reminding her about her upcoming trip.

When I saw the email pop up in my inbox (no, the Bug doesn't have her own email address), I couldn't help but smile. Then I called her over and said "Look! It's an email for you!"

"An email for me?" she grinned back in pure delight.

Thank you, Rapid Rewards. Not only is my toddler racking up miles for a free trip, but you made her feel like a million bucks because she "got mail."

It's a simple pleasure really. Email. Keeps us connected -- and gives us all that giddy, gooey "you've got mail" feeling. No matter how old you are, EVERYONE loves to get mail.

So teaching our kids how to correspond through email -- and laying a basic foundation for writing in general -- is important. We're starting with video email thank yous in our house. With just a little bit of coaching, your kiddo can compose a thank you note that you capture with your smart phone or computer webcam. Effortlessly.

Here are five tips for making a spectacular thank you video email -- with your toddler:

• Capture some 'real time' video of your kiddo playing with the toy, or wearing the article of clothing that they received as a gift. It's really tough to capture the enthusiasm and sheer joy of a toddler playing with a toy in words. Grandma and Grandpa will love seeing their toy being used!
• Start the video by coaching your child through a greeting. Who is the video going to? Ask them to "say hi" to Grandma and Grandpa.
• Coach your toddler to identify the object they received on video. Ask questions like "what are you playing with?" "Can you show the camera what you're playing with?"
  
• Be sure to say thank you! Ask your child to repeat after you: "Tell Grandma and Grandpa thank you for the baby doll!"
• Use inflection. Your toddler has explosive language development at this point in his or her life. Model appropriate tone and ask him or her to repeat. A flat "tell Grandma and Grandpa thank you" will get a lifeless "thank you" from your tot on camera. Eventually you want your child to write with emotion -- so start them out by composing video thank you notes with emotion.

The best part about video email thank yous is that the production or lighting doesn't have to be perfect. You just have to capture your kid. And let's face it, they're already pretty darn fabulous.

Plus you're teaching your child how important is to say thank you. That's one of those last-a-lifetime-kindergarten-skills you can get a jumpstart on.

Give it a try. I guarantee Grandma and Grandpa will love it.

Staying connected -- no matter how far apart you are -- is what email is really all about it. Which is why I love this little video from Yahoo that shows how a little boy is staying in touch with his mom, who's on a business trip.

That little six letter magic word... please!

We've got our toes in the water (age-appropriate beverage in hand) at the Outer Banks this week and decided to give ourselves a little blog break, too. We've got some fabulous guests posting for us and we'll get a few in there, too. Today's guest poster? Julie Blacker, founder and director of EtiKids.

Julie is a modern-day Ms. Manners for the preschool set. The fun and forward-thinking Manhattanite create EtiKids as a means of teaching social skills and school skills to children in an entertaining and developmentally appropriate manner.

We love EtiKids' fantastic newsletter and blog - - both jam-packed with great ways to teach your tike the skills they'll need for life.

Julie's admits that her biggest pet peeve is when that little six-letter word is left off of sentences and out of requests. So for today's post, she's chattin' up how to get your little one to use the "magic" word and mean it. And about that whole thing called behavior modeling.

Thanks for sharing, Julie!
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I recently did a survey on my website, www.etikids.com. The question was “do you make children say please when you ask for something?” Out of the responses, 58.3% said they do “all of the time.” 16.7% said “not as often as I should,” and 25% had other answers, including, “I will when I have a child!” and “Yes- but they are not my children…” 0% of the people said never!

The word “please” is to be used when you want something: to ask rather than to demand. That “magic word,” as it is often referred to for children, changes the tone of the sentence. An ultimatum begins to resemble a request, and the demeanor between the involved parties relaxes. A person is more willing to get the job done (with far less under-the-breath muttering) should that word be included.

The results of this poll should show just how hard it is to enforce that 1 word into daily vocabulary. Although it is amazing that more than half of the pollers are diligent about regularly enforcing the use of the word please, the 16.7% were brutally honest in their “not as often as I should” answers.

From an article on Parents Connect, Nanny Stella gives great advice for teaching children to use the word please (and thank you) in 3 steps: “1) show by example, 2) praise the pleases, and 3) be a broken record.”

Children truly learn from behavior being modeled, meaning, they learn by watching those around them. Control the market by showing them the behaviors that you want them to exhibit in public. If you want a child to hand you the cup of water instead of spill it, you should say, “Please hand me the water.” When the child uses the language on his/her own, praise him/her repeatedly. Positive reinforcement, is a highly effective way to teach children behaviors that you wish for them to continue without negative repercussions. Finally, if the child doesn’t use the word please, do not provide them with what they want until the magic word is said. For children, their new language can become innate with a bit of consistent practice. They will get it.

Children love challenges, so provide them the opportunity to rise to the occasion. Count how many people said, “please” when they asked for something, whether in a restaurant, in a classroom, in a store. Let the kids listen for the magic word, and let them watch people’s reactions when it is and is not used. Children can learn from their own recognition skills: why politeness matters.

Please is the most basic of social etiquette; the politeness displayed by the courtesy will open doors with its usage. Teaching children this social skill at a young age will ensure mastery and give them the tools to succeed as grownups.

Note: This post originally appeared on the EtiKids blog, and was reposted in its entirety with permission from Julie Blacker.